Winter Skin

It’s cold up here (or down here if you’re in Canada) in western Pennsylvania. Colder than usual this time of year.  I love winter. I’ve taken some wonderful pictures of a “Winter Wonderland”. Pennsylvania is a great place to visit, year round. I know what you’re thinking, “Nice place to visit but I wouldn’t want to live there”.

I find that as the weather changes, we put on our “winter skin”, (a great Jars of Clay song) which basically are sweatshirts, hoodies, coats, gloves, hats, boots, etc. Looks like we’re a bunch of bank robbers most of the time, and with my bald head, a stocking hat is always in order. Tellers back up when I enter a bank. Note to self: Keep your hands out of your pockets when entering a bank.

Side note: I’m not sure how these guys with shaved heads can go outside without a hat. My sinuses run like Rosie O’Donnel to a buffet. God bless you guys that can go out hatless.

Since we cover up, it seems it’s easier to be a bit less self conscious. We figure, “well, we’re covered up, we’ll get back on it in a few months…….when winter breaks………in June!”  Bad trap to fall into. If you start to feel a bit lazy, I have a way to help keep you on track.

Mirrors. I’m not talking “smoke and mirrors” or the mirrors at the fun houses that make you look thin (or heavy and one foot tall), but the real mirrors in the house.

Mirrors don’t lie. Have you ever been in a hotel (hopefully you don’t have this at home, because if you do, I hope you’re built like Mario Lopez or Jennifer Aniston) and you get out of the shower and there is a full length mirror mocking you? It’s a totally unexpected terror.

You’re not expecting it, exposed, buck naked, so immediately, after I’m done screaming, I do what I always do: I suck my gut in (As if the gut is the only problem). But it’s too late. My eyes have been damned for what they saw, burned into my skull, etched into my brain FOREVER.  I think, “If I was laying on the beach they’d throw me back in the water”.

Looking at myself from above (you know,dropping your head and checking out your body), it’s not so bad. But mirrors don’t lie. Neither do store front windows.

I walk in the mall or the outlets and see my profile in the reflection of the windows and think, “When did Alfred Hitchcock get here?”. So I do what I always do. I suck my gut in. It’s a good reality check.

Have you ever been out with your spouse and friend and think that everyone around you points out how big you are? And you want to scream at them, “Yes, but you should have seen me six months ago. I was really big!”. Why do we do that, or am I the only one?

It shouldn’t matter, but we’re programmed that to be overweight is akin to hanging out with Charlie Manson and going to visit movie stars. It’s degrading, people think you’re weak, lazy, whatever. But even though we say we don’t care, we keep trying to let people know we’re “working on it”. “Oh yeah, I’ve lost 20 pounds (ok, like three months ago and have been stalled like ObamaCare).”  Yeah, working on it.

But as Paul McCartney said, “I got to admit it’s getting better. Just a little better all the time”. Focusing on the real issue, which is: I’m doing this for me. And I’m thinner than I was 9 months ago, so onward we go. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Some good days and some bad days. But each day is a blessing. Seriously, you know what?

I got this.

Weight: 259.0 (250’s are my new normal. Sweet)




2 Responses

  1. You are hilarious. Please keep writing like this because if you continue to entertain me I’ll stay away from the fridge………….for a while. 🙂 Okay well I gotta go and read this again, getting a little peckish. (that is the absolute first time I’ve ever used that word, no joke).

    • Thanks Kate. I will attempt to use “peckish” three times today. Lol glad you liked the blog.

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